Have you ever been talking with a group of people when you make a joke and no one laughs but you? Has anyone ever looked at you funny because you laugh a bit too hard at your own jokes? Are you the funniest person you know?

Then this article is for you! We here at The Radish are certified experts at laughing at our own jokes, so buckle up!

First, you have to know what makes you unfunny to other people when you obviously have been blessed by the gods with your humor and jokes. Is it your delivery, being with the wrong audience, or that you’re telling the same jokes? Considering it absolutely can’t be you in any way shape or form, identify that.

Next, you have to come up with the jokes themselves. Here’s some tips on writing your funniest jokes!

1. Be sleep deprived! Telling yourself a joke at 3 AM after not sleeping for 24 hours with your only audience being the shadow man in the corner speaking in tongues is the same as telling an audience! Look at him in the corner, with his little laugh! Isn’t it adorable and so validating? Use that!
2. Honestly it’s the same with water, don’t drink anything because you’ll start seeing more people besides the shadow man who will laugh at your jokes! (Don’t call them hallucinations or they won’t laugh at your jokes, because they aren’t hallucinations, they're an audience from another realm.)
3. Shift to your desired reality! Let’s be honest, all of us had this shifting TikToks in 2020, we all saw those shifting videos. And all of them have tips for bending the fabrics of reality to be a comedian! They’re so trustworthy, and when you come back, your jokes will come back with you. Just ask your parents, who walked in on you in the middle of “shifting.” They aren’t laughing AT you, they’re laughing at your funny aura!
4. Learn what about your jokes makes other people laugh! If people tend to laugh more at your puns and delivery, then don’t focus on the type of jokes that rely on people knowing what you are talking about. It might be best to combine this with situational awareness. For example, if a banana truck explodes, don’t say “I bet they slipped on their peels!” That’s a horrible thing to say, and no one will laugh, believe me.People may not know about the fact that the truck was a banana truck. They will just smell the sweet smell of bananas with an undertone of burning human flesh. Instead, say “That’s bananas.” Nobody else may know what you’re talking about, but that would be a great joke later on! Who needs context when you’ve got crazy?
5. Ignore that last step entirely. Making jokes that rely on other people's suffering is the funniest thing anyone has ever heard! People will love your dark, edgy sense of humour. It attracts all the girls, and all the right type of guys! They’ll want to fist bump you so much that everyone when they hear your jokes will immediately start walking towards you with their fists raised!

And that, dear readers, is how to be funny when you actually suck! Follow all these steps to ensure your title as the funniest guy around!