Charlotte Rotlander

Fish Fails Precalc

Mass student outrage occurred this morning as it was revealed through an anonymous Instagram post th...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ April 2022

#News

#Tests

#Guest interview

Backpack Battles

Yesterday morning, all of Brooklyn Technical High School’s roller backpacks, vital aspects of the un...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ April 2021

#Yesterday

#Timeless news

#Guest interview

Kool Aid Man Goes on Rampage

This just in: Three dead, seventeen injured, thousands extremely confused, and five mildly confused ...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ November 2020

#News

Tri-Weekly Beach Trips

Dear students, We’ve noticed complaints of heatstroke, walking from the basement to the sixth floor...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ Quarantine Issue One

#PSA

The Choice

NBC’s new show, “The Choice,” has recently received backlash over its alleged murder of 46 adults, 7...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ December 2021

#Guest interview

Stimulus Bill Secrets Unveiled: What’s REALLY In It?

This pandemic has not been easy on the working people of America, those who struggle most economical...

Charlotte Rotlander, 3 more ∙ March 2021

#Investigation

Hey, You!

Hey! You! Yeah, you. Are you feeling lost, down on your luck, alone? Are you feeling cast away, like...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ November 2020

#PSA

#Letters

Vending Machine Injures Idiot

The following is a transcript of our chat with the local delinquent who damn near got himself killed...

Charlotte Rotlander ∙ November 2021

#Vending Machines

#From the field

#Guest interview

The Himbo

The himbo: A longstanding trope on the high school scene. They eat, they sleep, and they tie their s...

Charlotte Rotlander, 1 more ∙ December 2020

#Investigation

#Guest interview

How To Console A Crying Friend

Kidnap their dog and demand a reasonable, “small” fee for its safe return. Your friend will be elate...

Charlotte Rotlander, 1 more ∙ Quarantine Issue Two

#How-to

#Listicle

The Radish